Hey Cookie-Lou…it’s Hal “Chickie” Spear here with a travel tip so hot that it could brand the butt of a bitchy B-Town bull!

This is definitely something that only the Co$t Con$ciou$ Comic could find, since all he does lately is travel doing cruise ships and Vegas:

After my next cruise ship gig the muckymucks are flying me into Seattle but instead of  taking the second half of the itinerary - back home to Joisey – I’ve been pricing tickets on Expedia – for a trip from Seattle to Vegas on that day.

So Jet Blue is offering this most ridiculous flight plan – 11:39 pm Seattle into – get this – JFK NY! – then connect in JFK for a second plane to Vegas.  The entire trip from Seattle to Vegas  is 14 hours and 49 minutes!

But here’s the punchline Cookie:

The ticket is only $109 dolllars – that right – $109 smackarooneys (before taxes):

[EDITOR'S NOTE: We actually found the same ticket for just $99, but your mileage may vary...]

So technically you can buy this $109 ticket and use only the first part of the itinerary – just to NY – but make sure your Readers don’t check their luggage in all the way through Vegas (it’s called Carry On for a reason); the tag should read NY JFK - and bang, you’ll have a one way trip from Seattle to NY JFK for a measley $109 dollars!

If you try to buy a ticket direct to JFK, it’s usually around $159, and of course it’ll also cost your dignity since Homeland Security will be givin’ ya a full-on feely-meely friskie fest at SeaTac, seeing that one-way tix users are considered “terror risks.” But that’s yer problem Cookie-Lou, not mine – remember, I’m just the Co$t Con$ciou$ Comic.

Now that’s comedy my friend.

That’s comedy.

[Hal "Chickie" Spear is an old co-writer and friend of Scott Schaefer, Publisher/Editor of this here Blog. Chickie and Scottso wrote together for many years on Fox's "The Late Show" and Paramount's "The Arsenio Hall Show."]