During this recession, we’re always on the lookout for great bargains for our faithful Readers, thus we couldn’t resist posting this Craigslist Ad offering 50lbs of a FREE lard:
Found at: seattle-tacoma craigslist > seattle > free stuff:
FREE LARD (Burien)
Reply to: sale-924827964@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2008-11-18, 4:56PM PST
I have 50 pound boxes of lard free.
If you have a use for it, it’s yours.
I plan on making soap with mine.
And for those of you wondering what you could do with your 50 free pounds of said lard (other than making soap), here’s a recipe for “Old-Fashioned Lard Buns”:
OLD-FASHIONED LARD BUNS:
- 1/8 lb. fresh cake yeast
- 2 1/2 c. cold water
- 1/2 tsp. salt
- 1 egg
- 1/2 c. warm water
- 1 c. sugar
- 1/3 c. warm lard
- Flour to stiffen
Dissolve yeast in warm water; set aside. Mix together cold water, sugar, salt, lard, and egg; beat well. Next add yeast and sifted flour to liquid mixture until stiff. Knead dough until elastic.
Let dough rise twice and beat down each time. Last time roll into bun size balls. Let rise last time and bake at 350 degrees for 20 minutes.
NEWSFLASH: It’s not the roller coaster crashing stock market, bank failures or the impending election that’s a true sign of the apocalypse – it’s little things like this Craigslist Ad that are the real indicators of doom:
Found on: seattle-tacoma craigslist > seattle > general:
WHO’S THE BOSS COMPLETE FIRST SEASON 3 DISK SET – $5 (Seattle/Burien)
Selling Complete First Season of Who’s the Boss.
Great Conditon only been watched once.
Feel free to come by to take a look at it.
Cash Only Please.
Ask for Brian
206-243-2566
901 SW 118th ST
Seattle, WA 98146Email: sale-847642783@craigslist.org
RUN FOR THE HILLS!
PEOPLE ARE SELLING THEIR BELOVED, VIEWED-ONLY-ONCE
“WHO’S THE BOSS” DVDs AT BARGAIN PRICES!
PRAISE BE TONY DANZA!
THE END IS NEAR!
Here’s a fun way to end your week before enjoying the 3-day Labor Day weekend – a humorous Craigslist Ad from someone looking for volunteers for his “Time Warp project.”
We’re not sure if it’s intended to be funny or not, so we’ll let you decide; BTW, we don’t know what “waggerly nonsence” means either:
Found on seattle-tacoma craigslist > seattle > volunteers:
Needing volunteers for my Time Warp project… (Seatac)
Every wanted to travel back into time?
See yourself as you were.
Oh, maybe visit ancient lands and peoples.
Find out the mysteries.
Last nite, I was in the year 1100 A.D.!
How bout that friends.
No waggerly nonsence here.
If you would like to try it for yourself, drop me a line.
Thanks for looking
If you happen to become a successful volunteer for this “project,” please send us an email from the past.
Oh, and if you go back in time to 1982, please tell our then-best friend that no, that was NOT mayonnaise on his sandwich.
Found on seattle-tacoma craigslist > seattle > lost & found:
Found this rather amusing “Found” posting on Craigslist (our fave part is the second paragraph, where the Finder starts ranting about receiving nasty emails and advice on what to do with the found camera).
I found a camera in a rental car at the Seattle Airport. I posted a few photos from the camera. If you can identify the camera, the car you were driving, and some of the other photos in the camera, I’ll send it back to you. It looks like a fun wedding! Hope you had a good time.
Please stop sending me nasty emails telling me what I should have done with this camera. I’m trying to do something nice here. I contacted the Rental Company but the prior renter of my car did not report anything lost. The rental company does not maintain a Lost and Found at SeaTac airport. Craigslist is the best I can do. If I keep getting less than friendly emails, I’ll just delete the posting and sell the camera on ebay……how’s that!
Email: comm-798276830@craigslist.org
Found on seattle-tacoma craigslist > south king > rants & raves:
We have worked both on a “supernatural” TV show (Fox’ “Sightings”) as well as a “kids science” show (“Bill Nye the Science Guy”) so we’ve been on both sides of the fence, which means that we can truly appreciate today’s Craigslist Ad O’The Day about a boyfriend claiming to “see other dimensions” and a skeptic girlfriend’s reaction to it:
Dear loved ones…..
Soooo…..you wouldn’t believe the turn in events with Ben. The seemingly normal guy I have been dating for several weeks? Employed, decently mannered, bathes on a regular basis???
Well, he decided to have a ’serious’ talk with me the other night about something.
What you ask? Lets paint the picture….
Its late. I am tired. Half asleep really….not thinking clearly for sure. Fairly certain that if I blink too long I will drift peacefully into sleep.
But its important! We must talk now! Its been holding him back in our ‘relationship’ and without disclosing this information our ‘relationship’ can’t grow…
Ok. Must be important stuff so I shake off the cobwebs and try to imagine what could possibly be this important at this late hour?
I am expecting he used to be married, has a kid, a terminal disease? Something along those lines…..
But NOOOOO….I could no sooner begin to see this one coming than a nuclear bomb dropped on my house.
He sees dead people.
Ok, maybe not dead people – but people in other dimensions. Apparently since he was a small child he has been able to travel thru dimensions in the ‘clouds’ behind his eyes.
Yep. The clouds behind his eyes.
When he closes his eyes he is able to go thru these clouds and visit different realms and realities. He can have conversations with other people and then remember them word for word. He can even predict that during the winter solstice coming in 2012 there will be such a definitive change in the way the earth aligns with other planets and the sun that it will affect our DNA!!!! Yep! You heard it here first! The earths protons and smallest molecules will be affected – as will our DNA!
Holy sh*t……I better start preparing then! I had no idea that the world was going to change that much in just mere minutes…..11:11p WST to be exact….on 12-21-2012. (start planning your shelter now!)
Apparently those smarty pants Mayans depicted this over 5,000 years ago! And I am just hearing about it? I must be living in one of those clouds Ben sees! Holy smokes……
Well, when I began to question his ‘theories’ on the metaphysical principles he so adamantly states are finite and true!!!! he didn’t take it well and…in true form to those great minds that are misunderstood….threw a hissy fit, called me dumb (ok, he said ‘I wouldn’t expect you to understand’ with obvious sarcasm) and left stating triumphantly….’Adios!!’ as he went out the door!
This is where the shock sets in…..
Wait.
Yep, he just said that. All of it. And my small mind could not grasp the gift of knowledge that he just bestowed upon me so I was deemed unworthy and tossed aside…
Like an old rag. Like I didn’t matter….
Like I meant nothing at all (cue the music please…..)
Well, I don’t know about you but I just must! must! must! get working on my plan to survive the apocalypse that is closing in upon us….I know that my solid body may suffer greatly and my spiritual/metaphysical body may be forever changed due to those pesky protons and neutrons that are coming….
And my DNA…….lets not even think about that!
So, even though it looks like our relationship is over I wanted to pass on the important message that is secretly being spread by the ‘believers’….
Save yourself! The end is coming! 2012!
And, if you please just stop with the negative thinking….embrace the idea that he ‘knows’ this is all real! He (Ben) said so!!!! He has seen it all with his own eyes (over the river and thru the clouds…to Bens mind we go…)
* Oh, and if you know of any NORMAL, single guys that are gainfully employed, don’t live with their parents, and chew with their mouths closed….send em’ my way cuz I am back in the game.
Again.
Found on seattle-tacoma craigslist > south king > pets:
This sounds like the perfect pet for the kids:
I was given a male bearded dragon a year ago but i am moving now and cannot take him with me.
He is healthy, but very grumpy, and IS NOT A PET FOR PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT EXPERIENCED.
He is about 3-4 years old, and small compared to many other beardies.
He needs a loving, patient, and knowledgeable home that can give him care and are not afraid of being nipped in the process.
I am asking $50 for the beardie or $125 for both the beardie and the 25 gal tank with accessories that he calls home now, OBO.
Thanks so much.
Sometimes it’s fun to read the Craigslist “Missed Connections” and follow the fascinating storylines of all our rascally neighboring humanoids, and this last week was no exception.
We first found this ad on May 28th on seattle-tacoma craigslist > south king > missed connections:
How was your trip to Maui??? – w4m – 25 (SeaTac)
We met at at an airport parking place in Seatac on May 19th.
I was going to Disneyland and you were going to Maui.
You helped my daughter and I out with our luggage.
If you remember me, please let me know!
Then, a few days later, came this rather interesting rebuttal: 
Hi,
You posted this for my husband.
His trip to Maui went fine, I was a day late due to a conference.
Why do you want to know how his trip went?
You must be the lady he mentioned when we were in Hilo.
He said you have a nice looking daughter and thought that you may have adopted her.
He said you stared at him plenty.
Mrs. Jake B.
Found on seattle-tacoma craigslist > seattle > activity partners:
ISO someone to yell and hit me while I lift wieghts (Seatac)
Yes, Im searching for an individual who is interested in yelling directly into my face and or hitting (slapping) me about the head and breasts while Im pumping iron.
I need some extra motivation in the coming weeks to get ready for the 4th annual Super Lift in Vegas where I will be competing.
If intested let me know.
Thanks
Found on seattle-tacoma craigslist > seattle > computers & tech:
You may be familiar with the cult-like, time-and-life-sucking online video game called “World of Warcraft.”
Or not (in which case we congratulate you for staying sane).
Regardless, apparently in this totally virtual game you can create your own totally virtual (as in non-existent) characters.
Some people do this, then sell their totally virtual (non-existent) characters for cold hard ca$h dolla.
That’s what this guy is trying to do, and we thought it was an unusual ad worth a look.
Bonus points if you can understand any of the language used in this classified:
UD 70 Priest on US server Chogall.
has 2/5 S2 barely ever play him he has A Violet Netherdrake.
If interested selling the account will include box all the original goodies (Keycode for wow instruction book) His server transfer is up and he is on PVP server so he can go anywhere u want him to go.
If interested call me @ 206-290-6284 my name is brighton.
oh and im only willing to do this transaction face to face as to ensure security no paypal money wires. no sneaky sh*t this is all legit.
Yikes…found this today on seattle-tacoma craigslist > seattle > missed connections:
***MissKelly1977 on Match.com – HELP ME FIND HER!!! – m4w – 30 (Seattle / Normandy Park)
Dear Miss Kelly,
I thought I was drowning when I first seen your face. I think realized cause I had a mouth full of water and forgot how to breath.
I can’t explain it especially since like you, I’ve had my heart dented and was NOT looking in all honesty…but I’ve thought about you for the last two days ever since I’ve seen your picture and read your profile.
We have SO very much in common it’s crazy (likes, fav color, outlook on things)and I would like to get to know everything about you!
Nothing crazy…I just want to feed you.
Please get a hold of me!!!!! Anyone who knows her, please forward this message!
Red flag keywords/phrases that stand out here:
- “thought I was drowning…”
- “first seen your face”
- “mouth full of water and forgot how to breath”
- “heart dented”
- “thought about you for the last two days”
- “Nothing crazy…I just want to feed you”???
Hmmm…post your thoughts in Comments below…
Found on seattle-tacoma craigslist > seattle > games & toys:
PRICE INCREASED 3XX !! air hockey , arcade strength – $2001! – $2001 (City of ratus norvegicus)
Oh btw rat city is an unincorporated area between seattle and burien, know for rats and various government programs that the initials spelled out RTC or something that looked like rat city, anyway that is for those who have just moved here from california or some third world country who have no idea of seattle folk legends. Well reducing the price didn’t work so I have decided to do like OPEC, and Safeway and King County Tax Assessor and GREATLY INCREASE the price. Get it NOW before the price goes up again!!!!!!!!!!! This has got to be CRAIGSLIST’S April DEAL OF THE MONTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Second price increase!!!!! Just discovered that Jimmy Hendrix & Curt Kobain once played on this table!!! Now a collectors item!!!! And J P Patches etched his initials into the siderails, but you have to look hard, no documentation on the above but believe me it is real, and Pope Benedict blessed this table when he was in Seattle checking out a new location for the vatican summer residence in Medina, anyway.
Air hockey table, came out of Seattle playland, 1990, still has quarter mechanism but converted to auto play, shuts down after win then restarts by itself in less than a minute. Three pucks, 2 shooters. Works fine, maybe needs one or two light bulbs. Very heavy. $2001 or some REASONABLE offer, really soon.
Bring YOUR truck and make it go today.
Thanks, and may the sonics enjoy there trip to Oklahoma.
Email: sale-647753934@craigslist.org
Found on seattle-tacoma craigslist > seattle > free stuff:
Hello…I am 31 years old and moving back in with my parents.
I am a short angry man and I need to get rid of my couch because I can’t take it with me.
The couch is in usable condition. I need to have it out by 1:30 today. You haul.
Please contact me if you are interested: sale-620627735@craigslist.org
From seattle-tacoma craigslist > seattle > sporting goods:
Does anyone has an elliptical in really good condition so my fat wife can put a lot of use on it?
she is not looking so hot naked anymore so i need to put her on a workout program.
Send me your offers. a toned and healthy wife is priceless to me.
Found at seattle-tacoma craigslist > seattle > general:
Dessert by Jessica Simpson
Are you Whipped?
a sweet trio of seductive treats
Do me a flavor…
A seductive sampler of super whipped body delights in our most decadent flavors. Full of the things your skin loves, these sensual body smoothers taste as good as they smell – sweet, yummy and kissably delicious. Pick a flavor, shake it up and slather on a generous helping. Put a cherry on top. You’ll be impossible to resist.
4 oz. Deliciously Kissable Whipped Body Cream in 3 delectable flavors:
* Juicy ~ fresh and luscious ripe-berry sweetness * Creamy ~ a fresh baked vanilla and caramel indulgence * Dreamy ~ a decadent chocolate-coconut treat
To enjoy: Just smooth it on and if you’re in the mood, lick it off
Are you a Dessert girl? Dessert girls aren’t afraid to heat it up, shake it up, be a flirt, put it our there and flaunt it. They’re full of sweetness and desire and they don’t mind getting their hair a little messed up in the name of seduction. Dessert girls are warm and golden, luscious and radiant, tempting, and decadent. They like to look good, feel good and smell good too. Dessert girls are just plain yummy. Be a hottie. Have Dessert.
Wear it, then share it
Each body cream is 4 oz. – 12 oz total.
NEW in Sealed package.
$45 Retail
Asking $10 each or discount for multiples!
Several available
Email: sale-559771015@craigslist.org
